Mud, Mud, Glorious Mud!

I’m exhausted and can barely keep my eyes open, so this will be a short post. 

In the last week, I’ve been trapped at sea for days on end, had to supervise the humans in the rain, learned how to leap off the boat and onto the docks without having to wait for the slow humans, had my human cousins to supervise and had to march around an island looking at horses. (The cousins aren’t good at guarding and protecting their food- they are allowed on board anytime). Anyway, the humans were excited about the horses. I don’t know why as these horses didn’t have cheese. They just seemed like long legged dogs. Long legged dogs without cheese, just to be clear.

Hastings the boat dog watches wild horses, Cumberland Island, GA
Horses with no cheese to offer. Useless! 
I got bored looking at horses and decided to dig a nice little mud hole instead.

Now, the Long Haired Interloper has a serious psychological problem that causes me deep concern and even unhappiness. Dearest Darling Daddy, being wonderful, does not suffer from this affliction. Simply put, she’s convinced that clean is good and mud is bad. As all intelligent beings know, clean is beastly and mud is glorious. Mud is so fabulous it even has a ditty. Ahem.

Mud, mud, glorious mud!
There’s nothing quite like it for cooling the blood!
So follow me, follow me
Down to the hollow
And there we shall wallow
In Glorious Mud!

(If you need the tune for this, click over to youtube)
So I did some wallowing in mud, and LHI wanted a towel to wipe it off. LHI’s bath towel was produced. Even I could tell this wasn't my towel. It smells beastly clean. Maybe LHI is seeing the light and wants her bath towel to be corrected with glorious mud? We can only hope!

Off to bed. I bet I’ll be on duty all day tomorrow. Maybe I'll have more opportunities for wallowing in mud and searching for the cheese farm!

What do you prefer - "clean" towels or mud, mud, glorious mud? 

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  1. Ha ha ha. Hastings, you're the best . . . as are muddy towels.

    1. You are clearly an insightful and normal person! DDD used the remaining "white guest towel with delicate embroidery on it" for an oil change, so my campaign is going quite well. I think there's only one clean towel left!

  2. Horses are very silly creatures. I mean, who prefers eating hay and carrots over eating cheese? Did you ever think of getting the humans to sell this silly boat of theirs, buy an RV and take you up to Wisconsin where cheese is plentiful?

    1. I hate carrots like poison and spit them on the floor. Nasty!
      There's a whole state dedicated to cheese? Why am I just now learning this? What's the point to the other states? I'm going to look into this RV thing and jump ship! I bet RVs have A/C too! - Hastings


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