Swift

Beaufort, NC to New Bern, N.C.: In Vain, The Humans Struggle

Hastings the boat dog speaks.

Sure, the Bahamas were great. But the USA is the best! I was under appreciated in the Bahamas, and don't forget, Bahamians don't stock the 150 treat varieties I need to motivate myself through traumatic days with the humans. 
See all the snacks they stock for themselves? And only one small bag for me. 
The humans finally managed to pull anchor and excitement was high: we were going to land, real land, and we were going shopping for food, real food. Oh, joy! Then, there was a problem. There's always a problem. The starboard engine was dead. It's always Starboard Stan. He's a real lazy bones. Luckily, we were still in the anchorage, so we re-anchored and clever clogs went to work, fiddling with fuel filters. 

After about an hour of this fiddling, the problem was realized and solved. Seriously, it's really embarrassing (and worrying) to be trapped on a boat with humans that can't even keep their diesel tanks topped off. Supposedly, the gauge was dead, but in my experience, it's always losers that whine about doing their best. They even tried to tell me I was lucky they had jerry jugs of diesel on board, as if planning ahead for their own stupidity should get them an award. 

So, we're finally off, but it's time to hunker down again: the ocean is a bad place. So bad, that a very large wave drenched DDD at the helm. So bad that things in the galley went flying. Suspiciously, only DDD's Star Trek mug was injured (Trek is the one where they wear leotards, as opposed to capes. I prefer the capes). I think an accident is bound to happen to the surviving Jane Austen mug; her smugness about the pen being mightier than the light saber is beginning to get annoying.
We played chicken with a fishing boat in the channel, went through a bridge for the first time in months, and are back on inland waterways. Everything is so green! So much grass! So many trees!  



The humans told me I'd be walking on dry land tonight, but instead they had made such poor time they anchored in the rain in front of people's houses. 
The next morning they got up at 5AM to try and make it to real land before the storms started storming, but, again, we were forced to anchor and wait out a storm 2 miles from our destination. We finally made it to the docks, and I patiently waited for my A/C to be turned on. And waited. Apparently, they don't have an adapter to run shore power. Of course they don't. They're only human, after all.  
 What's your favorite snack after a long day of struggle? 

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6 comments

  1. LOL! Hastings, I agree with you. We humans are a bit dumb sometimes.

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    1. Sometimes? I have to show them how to open the refrigerator to get food out every day! It's exhausting!

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  2. Welcome back to real land, Hastings. I know some of your pals prefer beaches and water to run and play in, but a nice patch of green grass to roll in has its merits!

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    1. So many new smells! And grass, real grass just can't be beat.

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  3. Such silly humans! Look at all of those ginger nuts they stocked up on. I'd happily eat my way through a couple of packages of those.

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    1. Yes, every time we saw ginger nuts we bought them and ferreted them in different locations. We ended up with quite the stash!

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